Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
