Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
You know, be my cock's hype man.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
