Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
