We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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