That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize