is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
