i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
