ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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