Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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