FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
