See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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