I'm gonna have a badass scar
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
