no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
