i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
