just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
