C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
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Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
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Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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