You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
