Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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