my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Say something about gay babies.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize