I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
