How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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