so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
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