she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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