names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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