not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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