In America we eat man semen.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I will be naked everywhere
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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