so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
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