Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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