1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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