Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings

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  (206): A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings http://tfl.nu/86t1
  Replies (23) Good night (3251) Bad night (647)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever

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  (734): It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever http://tfl.nu/iaws
  Replies (12) Good night (6593) Bad night (544)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.

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  (240): It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued. http://tfl.nu/5cyo
  Replies (16) Good night (3860) Bad night (827)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.

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  (520): 2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out. http://tfl.nu/1knp
  Replies (26) Good night (8019) Bad night (1524)
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  (310): View more from California

  Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.

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  (310): Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius. http://tfl.nu/qlyj
  Replies (30) Good night (1740) Bad night (4417)
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  (650): View more from California

  guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?

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  (650): guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina? http://tfl.nu/cd8y
  Replies (40) Good night (3457) Bad night (1642)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy

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  (601): i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy http://tfl.nu/7bad
  Replies (6) Good night (676) Bad night (2060)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.

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  (518): I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here. http://tfl.nu/4g6f
  Replies (13) Good night (495) Bad night (2777)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that

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  (210): And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that http://tfl.nu/fyxx
  Replies (6) Good night (771) Bad night (464)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I can dry shave vagina like a champ

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  (512): I can dry shave vagina like a champ http://tfl.nu/x1sm
  Replies (20) Good night (624) Bad night (1830)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.

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  (336): I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012. http://tfl.nu/82uc
  Replies (5) Good night (941) Bad night (438)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk

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  (847): being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk http://tfl.nu/qiyf
  Replies (6) Good night (994) Bad night (457)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed

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  (704): it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed http://tfl.nu/73fn
  Replies (1) Good night (253) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.

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  (314): Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl. http://tfl.nu/hntx
  Replies (2) Good night (303) Bad night (805)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.

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  (413): I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college. http://tfl.nu/4oip
  Replies (4) Good night (598) Bad night (224)

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