In the future we'll all be gay
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
