he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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