i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Randomize
