Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
