NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
