why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
