so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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