y did u give ur computer a hand job?
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
