You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
