I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
