They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
