I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
So vagazzling was a success
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
