hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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