should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
You may now shotgun with the bride
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
