I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
