3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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