Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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