ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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