It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
