Where did you get a picture of my penis
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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