Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
and she was petting her beer can
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
