I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
