road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
